{"id":2896,"date":"2020-10-15T19:21:17","date_gmt":"2020-10-15T17:21:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bsf.ovh\/?p=2896"},"modified":"2024-09-23T17:55:29","modified_gmt":"2024-09-23T15:55:29","slug":"le-grand-saut","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.prendstadose.fr\/index.php\/2020\/10\/15\/le-grand-saut\/","title":{"rendered":"Le grand Saut"},"content":{"rendered":"

Apr\u00e8s une formation th\u00e9\u00e2trale au Cours Florent, Micha\u00ebl Benoit Delfini a fond\u00e9 la compagnie Artichaut<\/a> pour laquelle il \u00e9crit des pi\u00e8ces, met en sc\u00e8ne et joue des spectacles. Il anime \u00e9galement de nombreux ateliers de stimulation imaginaire, d\u2019\u00e9criture et de cr\u00e9ations th\u00e9\u00e2trales aupr\u00e8s d\u2019enfants et d\u2019adolescents.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\n

 <\/p>\n

J\u2019ai un cousin tr\u00e8s intelligent qui habite \u00e0 Sceaux. Dans les Hauts-de-Seine. C\u2019est v\u00e9ridique. Il y a une concentration de gros QI \u00e0 Sceaux parce qu\u2019ils ont mont\u00e9 un centre de recherche en physique quantique.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mon cousin est chercheur l\u00e0-bas. Il brille dans l\u2019\u00e9tude des trous noirs.<\/span><\/p>\n

Il m\u2019a toujours pris pour un idiot, mais, quand l\u2019autre jour, en me levant, je me suis aper\u00e7u que j\u2019avais un trou noir dans mon salon, je n\u2019ai pas pu m\u2019emp\u00eacher de l\u2019appeler.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cAllo Charles, c\u2019est Daniel, ton cousin.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cJ\u2019ai un trou de m\u00e9moire, l\u00e0.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cSi, le d\u00e9pressif.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAh !\u201d, il me dit, \u201c\u00c7a me revient ! Qu\u2019est ce que tu deviens ?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cJe touche le fond. J\u2019ai un trou noir dans mon salon et il a aspir\u00e9 ma t\u00e9l\u00e9.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

(Parce que tout mon mobilier avait \u00e9t\u00e9 aspir\u00e9 dans le trou noir.)<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cTu es bien s\u00fbr que c\u2019est un trou noir ?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cOui. J\u2019ai justement regard\u00e9 hier \u00e0 la t\u00e9l\u00e9 ton \u00e9mission sur les trous noirs domestiques. Il n\u2019y a pas de doute possible.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cAlors, l\u00e0, tu m\u2019int\u00e9resses.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

C\u2019\u00e9tait bien la premi\u00e8re fois.<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cTu habites toujours dans ton trou paum\u00e9 ?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cNon : j\u2019ai d\u00e9m\u00e9nag\u00e9. J\u2019habite Issy.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cT\u2019habites Sceaux.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cNon : Issy-les-Moulineaux\u201d. (Issy c\u2019est aussi dans les Hauts-de-Seine. Si vous voulez, pour ceux qui ne connaissent pas la r\u00e9gion parisienne, si Sceaux est ici, Issy est l\u00e0. C\u2019est un saut de bus.)<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u00ab\u00a0\u00c7a tombe bien, j’ai un trou dans mon agenda,\u00a0 je saute dans le bus. Je suis\u00a0 chez toi dans 20 minutes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cEt ma t\u00e9l\u00e9 ?!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il avait d\u00e9j\u00e0 raccroch\u00e9.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

20 minutes plus tard, il d\u00e9barque chez moi en trombe.<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cQuel temps de cr\u00e9tin ! Il pleut des seaux, ici. Heureusement que j\u2019avais mon paraseau en titane. Y a qu’\u00e7a qui tient le coup.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cJe suis content de te voir, j\u2019\u00e9tais au bord du d\u00e9sespoir.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cO\u00f9 est le trou noir ?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je le conduis au salon.<\/span><\/p>\n

Son visage s\u2019est illumin\u00e9 : \u201cQuel trou magnifique ! Tu as du\u2026 pot. J\u2019appelle une \u00e9quipe, \u00e7a te d\u00e9range pas ? C\u2019est pour les bienfaits de la science.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cJe file r\u00e9cup\u00e9rer mes \u00e9lastiques \u00e0 Sceaux pour faire un saut d\u2019exploration dans ton trou.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

(C\u2019est une technique qu\u2019il a mise au point pour sonder les trous noirs).<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cEt ma t\u00e9l\u00e9 ?!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cJe voudrais savoir si tu pourrais la r\u00e9cup\u00e9rer, parce qu\u2019avec les int\u00e9r\u00eats qui courent, j\u2019ai aussi un trou noir sur mon compte en banque.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cTa t\u00e9l\u00e9, tu la reverras jamais. Elle s\u2019est d\u00e9sint\u00e9gr\u00e9e en anti-mati\u00e8re. Tu n\u2019as pas suivi l\u2019\u00e9mission ? D\u00e9sol\u00e9, mon vieux.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il a claqu\u00e9 la porte. Je suis rest\u00e9 sans voix. J\u2019ai plong\u00e9 la t\u00eate la premi\u00e8re dans le trou noir.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

J\u2019ai fait le saut de l\u2019ange quantique.<\/span><\/p>\n

Y a des anges qui m\u2019ont chant\u00e9 des cantiques. Eur\u00eaka, Eur\u00eaka !<\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

Et mon corps s\u2019est d\u00e9sint\u00e9gr\u00e9 en particules d\u2019anti-mati\u00e8re. Mes particules d\u2019anti-mati\u00e8re ont tournoy\u00e9 dans le trou, jusqu\u2019\u00e0 retrouver les particules d\u2019anti-mati\u00e8re de mon salon. Elles se sont assises sur les particules d\u2019anti-mati\u00e8re de mon canap\u00e9 et ont regard\u00e9 les particules d\u2019anti-mati\u00e8re de ma t\u00e9l\u00e9 qui diffusait une \u00e9mission intitul\u00e9e Traverser l\u2019\u00e9cran.<\/span><\/p>\n

Je l\u2019ai travers\u00e9. Mes particules ont travers\u00e9 une \u00e0 une les particules d\u2019\u00e9cran. Puis mon corps s\u2019est reconstitu\u00e9 totalement neuf derri\u00e8re l\u2019\u00e9cran et j\u2019ai \u00e9t\u00e9 propuls\u00e9 vers la sortie du trou noir, jusqu\u2019\u00e0 mon salon.<\/span><\/p>\n

Je ne pensais plus ni \u00e0 ma t\u00e9l\u00e9 ni \u00e0 mes int\u00e9r\u00eats.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mon cousin \u00e9tait au bord du trou en train d\u2019attacher ses \u00e9lastiques.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cJ\u2019ai fait le grand saut !\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201c\u00c7a m\u2019\u00e9tonne pas de toi. Si tu veux bien te pousser pour laisser passer mon \u00e9quipe faire son travail.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je lui dis : \u201cTu sais avec tes \u00e9lastiques, tu trouveras jamais rien.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Il me dit : \u201cEn mati\u00e8re de saut, t\u2019en connais un rayon dis donc !\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Je l\u2019ai regard\u00e9 avec un air d\u2019imb\u00e9cile heureux. Je lui dis : \u201cPas autant que toi\u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u2026 et je me suis effac\u00e9 devant l\u2019\u00e9quipe de Sceaux (dans les Hauts-de-Seine) qui prenaient d\u00e9j\u00e0 Charles d\u2019assaut.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00a0Micha\u00ebl Benoit Delfini<\/strong><\/span>
\nSite : www.compagnieartichaut.com<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

\"Fen\u00eatre<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Apr\u00e8s une formation th\u00e9\u00e2trale au Cours Florent, Micha\u00ebl Benoit Delfini a fond\u00e9 la compagnie Artichaut 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